THE SENTENCE

A new life has begun, the cry of life fills the lungs of the innocent babe
Not knowing what the future will hold for this little one, mom and dad looks on
Wondering, what would she be like
Who would she be
What roads would this sweet little babe choose to trod in future times
Totally unaware that somewhere in the dark a vulture awaits
A quiet evil, an eerie calm, someone will prey on this little one
The thought fails to enter their minds
All they see right now is this little baby girl
The one God entrusted to them
A true gift straight from the heart and hand of God

For years the little girl seems fine and grows like any other
Spontaneity fills her being, a smile always enveloping passers bye’s hearts
A sparkle in the eye that captures people’s attention
A friendliness that draws people nearer
Almost like a magnet
But now the evil is drawing near
The vulture has seen her small innocent smile and he’s already decided her fate
Made a conscious decision that he will steal everything away from her
Deciding that she deserves no chance at living
No chance at happiness, no chance at adventure
Love, happiness, contentment, all the things that true life is made up of
He’s decided that the price she has to pay for her innocence
Is a pain that she will never be able to shake
A shame that she will have to carry till the day she dies
A broken life, like a porcelain doll shattered into thousands of pieces
A broken puzzle at her feet
Yes, that’s what I want for her, that’s what I shall give her

He lures her away whilst mom and dad trustingly looks on
He touches her and calls it love
He forces her to do things that hurt because she is so innocent and cute
He warps her beliefs and trust in people
Warps her sense of love and what that means
Suddenly the little girl is gone, the innocence has disappeared
Forced to make space for something else
The colossal pain, humiliation, guilt and shame of molestation
A weakling he is up until this day because he could not fight someone his own size
No, he had to choose a child because that’s all he could associate himself with
The effects of his unthoughtful deeds lying fresh
Even after twenty odd years
As fresh as yesterday, each memory perfectly preserved
Each pain, once unknown and unidentified, now linked to reason
Truly there is a reason for it all, every single thought of insanity
The dark clouds closing in, depression threatening the last bit of life that has remained
Questions tearing at her heart
How could someone hurt instead of love
How could a man look at a little girl that way
Who was there to protect the little girl
Why did they fail in their quest
Why was the little girl left to fight the battle alone
A battle that she will to this day, never be able to understand
Why did it have to be so long before she could admit the pain, the shame
Why did she allow herself to be bound for so long, caught, jailed, locked away from everything that should have been in the Master’s plan for her life

So many years later the little girl looks back, yes, she’s still that little girl
She’s never grown because the pain has kept her small even though the innocence, faith, friendliness, trust, sparkle, is gone …
She’s still here, I can almost see her now but I’m unable to touch her
I wish I could reach out and help her to healing
Wish I could show her that everything will be all right
Make her know that things are different now
That she doesn’t need to be scared anymore, that she can finally rest at night
Close her eyes and doze off into dreamy sleep
That no-one will come in the night and hurt her
That she will wake tomorrow morning and the sun will shine, outside but also inside her very being
I wish there was a way that I could show her the better side of life
Not the one where those who you think you can trust violates you
Not the one where the friend you so cherish is the wolf you have to be careful of
The perfect life where there are no vultures
The perfect life where all is at peace every second of every day
Where happiness surrounds and smiles never end
Where nobody hurts another and all is well

But there is no way I can do that
Judging from where I am sitting, the sentence has been given
The word has been spoken, actions louder than words
The weakling, the adult, the beloved friend has decided
“I hereby give you a LIFE SENTENCE”
Forever you will carry my burden, the shame and disgrace of what you’ve done
You were five, maybe six, but yet, you seduced a man
A grown up so totally taken by your beauty and innocence that he could not stop himself
You are to blame even though you didn’t even understand the difference between right and wrong
Who cares anyway what you were feeling
Who cares what you would experience later in life, if you would even have a life
Who cares about what it would do to you
Your sentence has been given
God created the perfect man
God gave a gift, a perfect little baby girl

But somehow the man God created got the message all wrong
God said He saw that man was lonely so He made the woman
Man must have misunderstood this fact because
Instead of turning to the woman …
He turned to the little girl …

JSA van Deventer

26 October, 2006