Latisha's Story

Hi, my name is Latisha. I also have been sexually abused as a child like so many others. The number of people who have been abused in my family and circle of friends amazes me. My Grandfather, my father, my uncles so many perverts. my father sexually abused me at an early age. I'm not even sure how old I was. My brother was a sickly child, so Mom was constantly in and out of the doctor's office with him. And left me with my father. He'd wake me and in his hand would be a jar of Vaseline. He'd rub his penis around my private part. I would lay there and cry. I'm not sure when it stopped, but it did eventually. At the age of 9, my cousin whom i confided in told my mother. She asked me about it, and I lied to her. To protect her and keep her happy, I lied. At the age of 15, I confronted my father and asked him why he did it. Only to! find out he had been abused also. But had no excuse to give me for his abuse to me. A year later, my parents and I discussed it. And because he was in front of my mother he lied. He said he didn't remember doing anything. My mother took his side and said that he was on too much medication for seizures at the time, and he probably didn't know what he did. I was so hurt and felt betrayed. And as a result, grew to hate my mother. To this day she haas no idea how much that hurt me. He is a Christian now, and after years of him cheating on my mother, they are finally happy together. I feel I have come to a peace within my self, but I am so afraid that one day it'll all change. I am married now to a wonderful man whom I love with all my heart. We don't have kids but I am afraid to have any, for fear that this will happen again. I will be too protective and hurt alot of family who just don't ! understand. But I live on, each day. I have survived this far and will keep on surviving. There's alot I don't understand til this day, but I teach little kids at church and try my best to tell them that it's wrong and to tell someone. They are so sweet, and innocent. And each day I pray God will keep his hand of protection on them so no one will ever hurt them. Thank you for developing this site. It is a wonderful haven for us. And I'll keep you in my prayers. Latisha